Its 4 years ago since our lives changed forever, the colours some how left the world, and I continually think about you, what you would say, how you would react to all the things in our lives.

It doesn’t get easier in some ways it’s harder if truth told, the gap ever increasing and the longing to see you also increases. We’ve definitely felt like life has fell off a cliff since you have gone, and we are in survival mode ever since.

Should we track the date? I feel like the body just knows the date, I start to get all agitated over little things, I get morose, then the day comes and tears flow. Somehow it’s the day the tears release and after I go back to trying to suppress it with a stiff upper lip. But it doesn’t mean I only feel the loss today, it’s all the time.